Time to Say Goodbye

I gave my 2 weeks notice on Wednesday.

Now that everything is a "done deal," I can finally come clean about the whole experience.  And you know what?  It absolutely sucked.

Not because of the normal reasons you'd think, like them screwing you out of vacation pay, your boss being a jerk about it, or anything like that.  (It was quite the opposite, actually.  My boss was the. sweetest. man. ever. when I told him and I heart him even more than I already did because of it.)

Barricaded in before giving notice.

The fact of the matter is, I ADORE the people I work with.  I love my job because of them.  I love what I do because I get to do it with them.  I have an AWESOME boss (two of them, actually) that I can be real with, and that value my work along with the person I am.  I have a team of people under me who step up to the plate whenever something needs to be done and I'm too busy to handle it (shout out to Troy).

Doing this?   It killed me.  I choked my way through the words, "I accepted a job offer with another company."  It literally felt like I was breaking up with someone I love.  I cried before I gave notice, I tried to not cry during it, and I cried after it.  I called my parents after work and broke down in tears.  Heck, I'm crying just writing this.  My heart actually hurts, and I was not expecting that.

I know what you're thinking, and that's cool.  Most people don't get it.  Their immediate response is to say, "That's awesome!  Two weeks of slacking off for you!  Why do you even care?  Not your problem anymore!"

Barber has a sad, and so do I!

People, I care more than you could ever imagine.  I do not want to leave these people hanging.  Even though I am realistic and know that I probably won't speak to 95% of the people I interact with now, I also know that I am leaving behind some of my absolute best friends...the people who laugh at my lame stories, start a chorus of ridiculously loud bless you's after every sneeze, and who can giggle with me for 45 minutes at 5:00 on a Friday (Tracy, I'm looking at you, honey!).  These people blocked my path with 3 office chairs, a cardboard barricade, and pleading looks as I went to resign.  These people have decorated their cubes with "I has a sad" posters in honor of my departure.  These people have helped form who I became over the last 7.5 years, and that's the person who my future employer saw as impressive enough to hire during this horrible job market.

And now I'm leaving them.

So, yeah, I got an amazing new job that people would kill for...but it's not exactly an easy move or a happy time for me yet, and I'm not ashamed to say that.  Because before I can say hello to working at home every day and growing my career, I have to say goodbye to the people I spend 9+ hours a day with...and can I just say?  It really hurts.  I can't tell you the number of times I have wanted to tell my boss, "Just kidding!  I'm not going anywhere!  I don't want to leave you!"

But you know what?  I am so. blessed. to even be having such a hard time doing this.  How many people can say that they absolutely do not want to leave simply because of the people they work for/with?  Not many.  And I'm so thankful for each and every one of them.

So for the next two weeks, I'm going to work my a$$ off for them.  I'm going to tell them all how much I appreciate their influence in my life.  And I'm going to savor every last second I have with them.  Because when I walk out that door in two weeks for the last time, I want to know that I gave them everything I had, because they deserve it.